When I started this blog, my intention was to share my journey through recovery. However, many of my posts have become more about my feelings at the moment I sit down to write. I post because I feel a deep need to share a story, and whether directly or indirectly, each post comes from the heart. Every entry holds meaning for me; it’s a reflection of my path, with both its highs and lows. One day, when I meet my soul mate, I’ll share this blog with them, when the time is right, and say, “This was me.” But that’s not why I do it. Writing here allows me to open up about topics that are important to me in my recovery, and if it can help someone along the way, that’s an added bonus. 😊
Today marks Day 37 of sobriety, and this week has taught me a lot about myself. I’ve titled this post “The Actor, Not the Director” because I often find myself trying to direct, control, or influence everything around me—whether it’s at work, before I step outside for a walk, or in everyday situations.
I need to let go of this need to be in control. It’s not healthy. There are others who can take on the role of Director, and my focus needs to be on myself. It’s going to be a challenge, especially since my career has been about directing, but I’m in a new phase now. Being the Director no longer serves me in this part of my journey.
