It’s called recovery for a reason.
As cliche as it sounds recovery is a process and a journey that takes time. It hits us all in different ways but there are things we all go through when we step into recovery from a chemsex addiction.
When I gave it up my mental health went downhill fast. I had to deal with life on life’s terms. No drugs to hide behind or twist the truth. Facing reality for what it is can be painful and ugly. It takes resilience strength and determination. If you can hold onto those three things you will grab recovery and move your life forward.
Relapse happens. Maybe once maybe twice maybe more. Every time is different but the truth is relapse never gets easier. It gets uglier messier and darker. The drugs never hit like they did that first time you put the pipe to your mouth.
I’ve suffered with anxiety and depression since leaving that life behind. I’m on medication now and I have support around me that helps from different angles. Still it’s tough and some days feel impossible.
But no matter where you are in the world or what chemsex meant to you the choice you make now will shape your future.
Don’t give up. It does get better. I’m not fixed. I still have a lot of life stuff to deal with. But it’s less than I had six months ago. And the things I struggle with now are things most people can relate to.
Love you x
